J and I have always practised what I've been thinking of as "rough sex". It's hard to judge precisely how kinky we are as there's no standard, a bit like nerdiness, but I always considered us pretty tame. Compared to vanilla sex we're pretty damned kinky though, hence my inability to judge. However, this desire to explore further wasn't born until quite recently so I've not been unsatisfied with having "merely" rough sex.
I think the real turning point was when a friend linked me to Shelby Cross' blog. I started to read and couldn't quite stop. First of all, it was hot. She's great at writing erotica, I haven't bought her books yet but there's plenty on her blog that has convinced me. Now, I've seen plenty of porn which incorporated elements of BDSM but none of it managed to turn me on quite like this blog. More importantly, none of that porn made me crave the things depicted. It was something of an awakening, or possibly a re-awakening.
When J and I first started to get rough with each other, many years ago, I realized we were technically doing BDSM and I became curious about it. I joined Darkside, a Swedish equivalent of Fetlife, intent on finding out more about what there was to BDSM. Unfortunately I found the site to be intimidating and I left pretty quickly, thinking it probably wasn't anything for me anyway. I don't know if I was really ready to delve deeper into BDSM back then or not but regardless I'm glad my curiosity has been rekindled.
I've been reading a lot about BDSM since then, it's all so fascinating. Lately I've been reading Mistress160's blog, particularly her BDSM for Beginners series. It's a great blog and I've found that even things which aren't relevant to me as a female sub, like CBT, are absolutely fascinating to read about. Take note though, if you're sensitive you should take care when navigating Mistress160's blog. Just read her warning carefully and you won't accidentally stumble across something you didn't want to see.
IRL I haven't actually gotten much exploration done lately. Poor J has been stressed out about an upcoming exam and he managed to catch a cold on top of that so we've mostly been restricted to snuggling. He did give me a surprise spanking the other day though. Considering that I was still wearing my winter clothes, three layers of fabric over my ass specifically, I was impressed the he managed to make it feel as though I wasn't wearing anything. He also quite enjoyed being able to use more force than he had before.
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| These were quite strong but definitely fun. |
I also tried out the clothespins on my myself. I placed them in a couple of different locations for 15 minutes at a time. The first two tries were done with quite few pins but for the third try I put five on each arm. Removing them was agonizing and I can definitely see J having fun with it. For the last try I put four pins on each breast, I couldn't put them on my nipples though, that simply hurt too much. This last try was some seriously painful 15 minutes. I found myself squirming as I waited for the minutes to pass. Removal was about as painful as could be expected.
Overall I think the clothespins have some great potential and I'd be interested in acquiring additional ones with varying strength, the ones I tried here are apparently quite strong for clothespins.
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